There's been a lot of talk about mullets recently in the section of the blogosphere where I spend time, admittedly, much of it by or instigated by me. It makes sense to discuss the mullet, because it's just plain funny. Since I'm a scientist by trade and by nature, I feel the need to categorize everything. I figure if we're already talking about them, why not apply that idea to mullets? I know, you're thinking a mullet is a mullet, but it's so much deeper than that. So many styles, so many names. (Sadly, I'm making it sound like I just decide to do this now, but in reality I've been doing this for far too long.) For example:
The femullet or fe-mullet: A mullet worn by a woman.
Permullet or frullet: The permed or otherwise fro-style mullet. (Photographic evidence of said mullet would be greatly appreciated)
The beaver tail: Rather than the typical "party in the back" section, the hair on the back of the head is styled into a long, straight flat tail giving it the appearance of a beaver's tail. Possibly worn by those nostalgic for Fess Parker's portrayl of Davy Crockett.
The Bolton: A classic mullet combined with a rapidly receding hairline.
The skullet: A classic mullet in which the top of the head is completely bald. (Possibly the best name on the list and not even remotely my invention.) Also called the Modified Bolton.
And finally, who could forget the flathead?
I'm sure there are others, but those are all I can think of at the moment. Any others you've noticed roaming free?
July 17, 2006
Mullet Taxonomy
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8 comments:
Since we're categorizing, I think it would be interesting to research and list the top mullet-producing cities in the U.S. (We'll leave Canada out of it, because they're still embracing the mullet as the official national hair style.)
I can tell you from experience that Buffalo, New York has got to be close to the top of that list.
Party in the back! Ha ha!!
If there's something about mullets that isn't funny, I haven't heard it.
I don't see them around that much anymore (with the popularity of HUGE trucks, SUVs, Hummers, etc.), but in high school, I definitely remember a ton of people had mini-truck mullets.
I think the 909 is one of the top producers of the mullet in all its various manifestations. At least on the West Coast.
I'm still looking for pics of my many mullets in high school.
In upstate NY, where I used to live, one can find what I've called the Metal Mullet; the 'business in the front' is tuffed, teased or sometimes spiked in a manner that reminds me of Rod Stewart.
Craig - we have a picture of a permullet. I took a picture of someone at the zoo.
Danielle - isn't Buffalo part of Canada? Border cities (maybe even states) shouldn't count. :)
Mikey - we see them nearly every time we go shopping. If we are going to "The Wal-mart", it is a given that we'll see one.
Ghosty - they still do the Metal Mullet in Kenosha, WI. It's like going back in time.
Kenosha? Shoot, you go there, you'll have a hard time finding someone who doesn't have a mullet.
But hey, at least you're just down the road from Mars Cheese Castle. Don't laugh. I, too, scoffed... until I went in there. Man, them's got some good cheese there.
My sister and I go to Kenosha simply for cheese curds and Carl's Pizza (and also to visit our grandmother, of course). We rarely admit that we grew up there! Mullets, metal t-shirts (ripped down the sides to make them pseudo-wife-beaters), and porn alley - not a place to be proud of.
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