Celebrity Gossip Amuses Me

Before I begin, please forgive me for going VH1 on you with today's post, but I love pop culture and even if I couldn't care less about it, celebrity gossip amuses me. The complete absurdity of everything in the lives of these people makes me glad to be an unknown nobody with a blog.

Today's example: Lindsay Lohan. I have two wonderful articles from MSN for your reading pleasure today. Up first is this one about a break-in at her house in LA. I'm not one to gain amusement from someone else's misfortune (ok, I am but this isn't about me), but this article does raise some questions.

First of all: How does someone break into a house and steal a big-screen TV? It's not really something you can just tuck under your shirt and carry away. It's got to be quite cumbersome to move around. After all, it's big. It says so right in the name.

Second: How does someone break into a house and steal two big-screen TVs? Were they pretending to be a moving company? Was this an episode of Punk'd? Was this actually a repo service?

Third: The thieves stole broke into her liquor cabinet and stole alcohol. She's 18. That would make her a full 3 years below the legal age to purchase, own or consume alcohol (though plenty old enough to vote, drive, consent or serve in the military). Shouldn't there be some question of who is selling to a minor? Or for that matter, why the alleged thieves apparently drank several bottles of vodka while removing things from her house? I guess that goes back to the pretending to be a moving company theory.

Finally and most importantly: There is a very brief mention at the end of the article of Lindsay sending drinks when she was at a restaurant and saw Robin Williams and Walter Cronkite at another table. What were Robin Williams and Walter Cronkite doing dining together? This has to be worthy of an in-depth expose from some news source.

I won't comment on the second article as much, as it pretty much speaks for itself. All I can say is that I hope and pray this is true, and that I hope someone had the presence of mind to video the whole thing. There is no higher form of comedy than a dance-off. Unless it's a celebrity dance-off.

Until later...