The Fount of Useless Information Overanalyzes Lyrics

Under the lyrical microscope tonight: 50 Cent's hip-hop ballad/interrogation "21 Questions".

Before we get too far into the lyrics, a note on this song. Is it a good song? No. Does it stick in my head longer than I want it too? Definitely. Do I enjoy the song? Yeah, I do. It's a guilty pleasure song. I like it, but am a little ashamed to admit it. Come on, it's hard to resist any song in which Nate Dogg sings the chorus. You just have to sing along.

On with the lyrical dissection.

Could you love me in a Bentley?
Could you love me on a bus?
I'll ask 21 questions
And they all about us.
Could you, would you with a fox?
Could you, would you in a box?
Do you like green eggs and ham?
Do you like them Sam I Am?

One of my favorite things about the song is definitely the Seussian quality of the lyrics. I'm not sure if this is what he originally intended, but it certainly sounds that way to me. I only wish he had followed up with a release of "50 hears a Who."

And in bed if I used to my tongue, would you like that?
If I wrote you a love letter would you write back?
Now we can have a lil' drink you know a nightcap
And we could go do what you like, I know you like that

I'll ask any of the more sensitive readers to please forgive that section of lyrics, but I will also remind you they are his words not mine. Really though, read that section again. What woman could possibly resist such heartfelt words? This truly is the epitome of love given musical form.

And always remember girl we make mistakes
to make it up I do whatever it take
I love you like a fat kid love cake
You know my style
I say anything to make you smile

Subject-verb agreement issues notwithstanding, let's focus on the line "I love you like a fat kid love cake." While I'm sure most people will immediately assume that 50 Cent is making a typical fat joke and that he is using the comparison because fat kids really, really, really love them some cake. I will have to politely disagree and point out that if you are willing to look a little deeper you will find the true profundity of the song. Go back and look at the song as a whole. He's asking 21 questions, but really they are all the same question; "I'm insecure. Do you love me?" This song is about his dysfunctional relationship with a current girlfriend. He can never be sure whether she truly loves him or whether she just loves his money, fame and image. His insecurities make him question her love, but they also make him come back to her. He is insecure and hates himself for loving a woman he cannot completely trust, but because he is insecure and hates himself he has to keep coming back to her. Thus, he loves her like a fat kid loves cake. It's really quite an amazingly deep song when you look at it that way.

A brief final note before I leave to ponder whether anyone might actually believe I was serious: In writing this post, I was actually very surprised to go through and count the questions in the song and discover that there are, in fact, exactly 21 questions (not counting repeats). Unfortunately, 50 Cent only asks 17 questions, and Nate Dogg asks the remaining 4.

Until later...