Have you ever stopped to wonder what ads for TV shows would sound like if the networks were completely honest, or even a little more honest? No? A complete waste of time, you say? Well, it's a good thing you have me around to think about things like that for you. I decided to see how some shows that have been on in the past year or so would advertise themselves. Here are the results.
Eureka: Blessed are the geek, for they shall inherit the earth, and we shall make a comedic soap opera about it.
House: Admit it, you watch it for the insults.
Blade: the Series: Half naked girls and choreographed fight scenes. Like professional wrestling with less scripts.
Nanny 911: A chance to see people with kids brattier than yours.
Lost: Don't ask us, we're just as confused as you are.
CSI Miami: Acting? We don't need no stinking acting.
Studio 60: It's a new show from Aaron Sorkin. Watch it, or people will look down on you.
Ghost Whisperer: We know why you watch. Ladies, get ready to cry. Guys, get ready to ogle.
Survivor: We'll do anything for ratings.
Grey's Anatomy: Because you have to work during the daytime, but you still love soaps.
The War at Home: We can't believe we're on the air either.
24: This season, Jack Bauer is going to kill a bunch of people. Does anything else matter?
The Real World: Some people say we started the Reality TV craze. We're sorry.
Heroes: OK, who let the nerd write a TV show?
Big Brother: We'll do anything for ratings...except be entertaining.
Mythbusters: Mixing science and destruction, but mostly destruction.
Battlestar Galactica: Remember the series from the seventies? It's kinda like that, only our Cylons are hot.
Jericho: Proving that even as their world collapses around them, people still have the ability to make their lives worse by being idiots.
Trading Spouses: We don't mean it like that. Although, we are on Fox.
January 10, 2007
Truth in Television Advertising
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4 comments:
What I'm waiting for is really fun commercials on cable.
Like a commercial for Pizza Hut where everybody is just so excited about how bleeping good the bleeping pizza is! I mean, this pizza is the bleep! Bleep! Bleep, I gotta order another one! Bleeping bleep, man, you gotta try this!
Yeah, too few people have HBO, but that's what YouTube is for.
I still remember the first liquor commercial I saw a couple of years ago on cable. Kind of weird. But I resent that about Grey's Anatomy!
My recommended changes
Desperate Housewives- Because we work during the day but we still want to watch Soap Operas
Grey's Anatomy- Sexy doctors in every flavor
You two can resent all you want about Grey's Anatomy, but it won't change two things about it.
1. If it were any more of a soap opera, they'd be ready to introduce a character named Dr. Drake Ramoray.
2. It just started getting shown in syndication...on Lifetime.
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