May 14, 2009
What Lies In The Shadow Of The Statue
May 12, 2009
You Know You Want To Watch This Too
Throughout history, mankind has asked one question more than any other: "Why am I here?" We need a sense of purpose to feel fulfilled; we need to feel as if we are part of something larger. Individuals have come up with their own answers, but never has a single event or a single theme been able to unite us all.
That, my friends, is about to change. All of modern technology has been building to this, the pinnacle of this or any other civilization. Yes, I speak of Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus.
Why are we on this planet? So that this can be made and so that we can watch it.
I know it's difficult to wrap your mind around this if you are just learning of it, but let's consider just a few of the glorious things we see in this trailer.
1. Lorenzo Lamas
2.
3. Not just a shark, a Mega Shark
4. Giant Octopus
5. Mega Shark and Giant Octopus fighting each other
6. The octopus is so giant that it destroys an oil rig
7. And slaps a fighter jet out of the air
8. The shark is so mega that it attacks what appears to be a battleship*
9. And the Golden Gate Bridge**
10. And a commercial airliner--in flight
11. One or both of them appear to destroy a submarine
12. Something is making the smoke monster sound from Lost
The movie comes straight to DVD later this month and it may or may not*** be at the top of my Netflix queue waiting for the release date.
*I can only hope this leads to a "It sank our battleship!" line in the actual movie. Movies this bad need lines that awful.
**The bridge, people! It jumps up to take a bite out of the bridge. Can sharks in any other movie do that? No, they aren't Mega enough.
***Oh yeah, it is.
May 06, 2009
Oh Look, Something Involving Science Is in the News and Craig Is on a Soapbox. Everyone Act Surprised.
I've debated on posting something about all of the swine flu panic and have restrained myself because I don't want to try to sound like I'm putting myself out there as an expert (mostly because I'm not even remotely qualified to be one). In a turn of events that is surprising to absolutely no one, I can't keep my thoughts to myself and have to at least give you a little bit of commentary.
May 05, 2009
Trivial Tuesday
With Star Trek coming out this week, I figure why not make it three questions in a row that have to do with Star Trek. As you have probably heard by now thanks to the non-stop media blitz leading up to the movie's release, Eric Bana plays Nero, a Romulan who travels through time. In an interesting coincidence, Bana also refuses to be temporally bound in his next film. What novel-adaptation is his next role?
May 04, 2009
X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Pro and Con
Con: The title.
Pro: Stuff blows up.
Con: Computer graphics when Sabretooth runs on all fours.
Pro: Fight scenes.
Con: Attempt at a plot failed miserably.
Pro: Attempt at a plot is just a way to justify action sequences.
Pro: Deadpool*
Con: Deadpool*
Pro: Introduced to new mutants
Con: Most new mutants are basically cameos and are often very different than comic versions.
Pro: I've always liked Gambit's power.
Con: Why doesn't Gambit have an accent?
Pro: Did I mention stuff blew up?
Con: Holding arms out while looking up at the sky and screaming. (Did Wolverine just find out Padme was dead?)
Pro: Jackman and Schreiber seem to have put a lot of effort into getting into shape for the movie.
Con: What did they do to [actor's name held back for spoiler] in the escape scene with the kids? That scared me.
Pro: Most of the action was over-the-top and unrealistic. (In a movie where a guy pops metal claws out of his hands, that's allowed to be a pro)
Con: Wolverine butt
Verdict: Bad, but not so bad that it wasn't still fun.
Random note: I realized after writing this that X3 also got a pro/con list instead of a real review, but even that was more thought out than this one.
*I can't really explain that one without a lot of spoilers and an attempt at explaining the plot and it's really not worth it.